UGLY DUCK

when i was really little i used to look like a boy and im not kidding.
people actually asked my mom about her son. and for some reason she thought that was okay so she always cut my hair super short and only made me wear dresses on hoildays. i was also chubby which is really funny to think about if you see me now.

i guess i thought i was a boy too, not that i had alot of boys as friends or girls as friends i just kind had the mind set since i didnt look like a girl.

so i guess i was always meant to be extremely confused and my mom always asks me if i am a lesbian. well to be honest im not sure what i am. i havent had enough relationships go through to say exactly. and if i did they were also just as confusing and gender bending. so i might never know.

but ugly ducklings never really turn into beauitful people. im just average and just as wiered as ever. i know more about how i am suppose to look, and how im suppose to act, but its never quite right at least not for me. they always have a bunch of strandards to compare themselves too. and remember what was told to them by other people to change about themselves.

being called pale and an albino didnt make me go tanning, sorry bitches.

being called ugly didnt make me get plastic suregery.

being called a loser didnt make me get friends, or a boyfriend.

and being called anything else didnt make me do anything about it.

even though i considered doing all of these things, i made myself over in a way over the years, so really you were all no help at all. if i was not secure with myself i would not be able to say all of this.

if anything you made me dislike being here for a while, but it didnt make me kill myself.
so really you did nothing at all. and noone really knows shit about me so i can never really get hurt.